Simantics: Catch (up on) the madness

I’m back to playing the Samples! I have a couple of posts worth of gameplay, but I think I need to play a bit further to see where things are going before I start posting again.

If you have some reading time, my ISBI is two more posts from heir poll. It’ll probably go up this week. Take a look: We’re All Mad Here.

And without further ado, a WHOLE LOT of Simantics that I was saving up until after the heir poll.

Freezer Bunny gnome takes his place on the award shelf. Er– is that a Santa Claus freezer bunny? Riding a mummy llama? I cannot track all the gnomes.

The best EA-generated name EVAR.


Can you find Edmund? Do you think there’s something missing from this lovely picture of broom flying?

What about this brother-sister chat over lunch?

Time to remove some of the vegetation at the park.

Hmmm. If THIS had happened earlier, I probably would have had Sawyer go for it. This is Sam Pistachio, Sam’s simself from The Dysfunkshinul Legacy.

Sawyer has gotten like two heartfarts EVER from residents of Avalon — as opposed to half the female residents of University, where he was apparently a woohoo god. Emily Doctor is one, and Sam seems to be the other. There might be a third somewhere who is married.

Even better, Sam clearly knows what she likes, since this is the scene where she discovered her attraction to him.

Even though Sawyer’s pretty set on Emily at this point, I feel the need to do something about this perfect pairing.

Now, Sam recently gave me the most touching gift I’ve ever received in Sims blogging: My simself’s bastard son with her oh-so-sexy legacy founder Tewl Langurd.

Folks, meet Java Langurd-Weaver.

Traits: Coward, hydrophobic, light sleeper, photographer’s eye, proper. World-Class Gallery.

Java would be a great photographer if only he could get a little closer to the action. His professional colleagues urge him to “get down and dirty” with his subjects, but the mere thought of it makes Java shudder. The trouble is, he hates water and germs and is very easily startled. His published work is known to be distant at best, shaky at worst. “Ah yes, that one,” he says, referring to a blurry portrait. “A bug landed on my shoulder.” He confesses that he sometimes lies awake at night, terrified that his unsatisfied clients will burst in and murder him. “I prefer to experience the world from behind my camera,” he tells us. “Ideally, they will invent a lens with such a powerful zoom that I will be able to take photographs from my dinner table.”

You’re going to see his elf alter-ego wandering around Avalon very soon.

I think I should return the favor and create a bastard child of Sam and Sawyer. What do y’all think??

Moving on…

Continuing the theme of creepy things that should not be shared, WordPress blog stats seems to be much less free with the search terms it reports. That means I’ll probably get fewer reports that look like this:

Such an uncomfortable view into the seedy underbelly of the Internet there.

Oh, HERE’S why we had a line of sims peeing themselves in the background of Edmund’s tea party with Joy Reacher….

Mulberry Marmalade Saunders seems confused about what to do at the beach in the rain on the last day of Autumn.

Vickie sneaks out of the house to go to school. Because EA grounding is stupid.

It turns out there’s a mod for that, of course. I want to keep the punishment system, just make it less stupid. I’m trying out this one: User-Directed Scolding + Other Punishment Tweaks.

Everyone hated on each other at Winston’s birthday party. Especially the party crashers. Gamora thought it was awesome.

Victoria got into a huge, drawn out fight with the ghost of her step-grandmother Xia.

I like this shot of her being angry.

Then she had a bit of a problem with her makeover.

Maybe it’s witchcraft.

Here, Vickie has a vertigo problem after using the LLAMA transporter.

Man, when teens vomit, they REALLY get personal about it.

 And finally, I cannot seem to stop this problem:

OK, the last one was legit, just silly.

I purchased some broom upgrades for our family witches, and they spend almost all their time being snatched up and used by non-witches. I have set preferred vehicles several times.

I thought you needed to be a witch to ride a broom. You think there’s a mod for that??

Avalon Gossip Column

Warning, gentle readers, I’ve been hoarding updates, so this is LOOONG.

After doing nothing much more than writing books and occasionally schtupping a geriatric Asriel Bookabet for most of her life, Sam Pistachio’s life has gotten a lot more dramatic.

After sim-weeks of comparative bliss, Sam and Asriel’s relationship took a sudden downward turn. Bystanders began to see them having vicious fights in public places.



But apparently the woohoo was still pretty good, because it was several more sim-days before I got this one:


The last woohoo was apparently the best woohoo, though, because Sam walked away from that relationship pregnant. I don’t have a popup of the baby’s birth, though. I need to check on that.

Sam immediately jumped into the equally geriatric arms of the Xia Wu’s baby brother JC.


Asriel didn’t take very well to that at all.



Then Asriel and JC both died of old age. Beware, old folks, Sam Pistachio is on the make.

Before Asriel died, I discovered THIS about his career:


Say what? Wasn’t he a criminal for most of his life?

Sorry, Jo, the last original Bookabet has passed on. BUT! Asriel has a new baby in the works. He also has his much older son Timothy with my alternative-simself Zuzu Weaver.

Timothy and his husband Sherman seem to be doing pretty well. They got their own place.


Then they popped out a couple of kids: a boy and a girl in short succession. I’m particularly fond of their daughter.


But Sherman never DID get over the fact that Dion Callender dumped him to go to the prom with Abby Sample, as evidenced by the stream of stalking notifications I have been receiving all generation. This leads to some pretty intense fights with Timothy.


Dion, meanwhile, is busy as a single dad to the three kids he had with man-and-womanizing douchebag actor Justin Marmalade. He’s moved on, Sherman. He really doesn’t think about you anymore.

Police Chief William Pierce’s empire of corrupt law enforcement seems to be finally coming to an end. Looks like he got busted.

William Demoted

Argh. The Crumplebottoms simply will not breed on their own, and they owe it to their noble line to produce an heir to Chateau Crumplebottom. I may have to intervene yet again.


Matt Doctor Callender, the vampire sweetie of also-vampire January Callender, has been a criminal for two generations. Here he is getting promoted to Level 3.


Matt needs a new career. He must be the most inept criminal in the Forest Sample – Sean Flynn underworld empire.

Glitchy teen-lovers Rosalie Weaver (daughter of my simself Echo) and Janice Bookabet (daughter of Jo’s simself from the Bookabet Alphabetacy and grandaughter of Ada Sample) aged to adult and immediately got married. That’s a good thing for the glitch-twins they managed to give birth to in high school despite the fact that I emphatically do NOT support teen pregnancy in my game.


In the creepy May-November romance department, Janice’s sister Kari hooked up with Emily Doctor’s ex-husband, who is descended from Adjo Sample. It’s not going well.


Charlene Mai-Yo, who I believe is the daughter of Shanni Sample Crumblebottom’s second wife, has a dog problem. I’ve heard of a crazy cat lady, but this is ridiculous.


THEN we close shall close with the saga of Manisha Kapoor.

After getting kicked out of the house by her roommate Eloy Berg, Manisha rapidly courted, moved in with, and married the elderly Charlotte Stemple. Charlotte Stemple was born of immaculate conception from Charles Sample and a random Chinese townie in World Adventures.

It was not long before Charlotte passed to the Netherworld.


This left Manisha without a provider, so the next sim-day, she fell into the arms of Hunter Sample’s adopted son Ash. Ash is the biological son of Weston Mentary of The Simmentary.




Looks like Manisha has provided very well for herself.




4 thoughts on “Simantics: Catch (up on) the madness

  1. I was so excited to see the Samples in my inbox again! Whenever I read your blog, especially these Simantics posts, I want to abandon my Sims 4 and play Sims 3, because the world is so immersive and amazing, but then there are So. Many. Glitches. And so many idiotic things like the sneaking out to go to school. If I was a woman of leisure, I’d play Sims 3 and Sims 4, and maybe Sims 2 as well. Oh well. I just miss Seasons and the other expansions from 2 and 3 so much.

    Manisha is so adept at finding sugar sims, right? Is Charlotte’s dog problem a glitch or a feature? That last broom riding picture was hilarious, with the snorkle gear. I think they did use googles sometimes in Quidditch, right? And I read the post in which Java was spawned (and force killed, and saved, etc) and that was quite a party. I look forward to seeing him about town.

    • You always have great comments!

      The vision for Sims 3 is so awesome, but it’s not for the faint of heart I know. I’ve been modding it and tweaking performance for years, and feel comfortable in it. I have a lot of trouble contemplating giving up some of the best parts, like the open world, in favor of Sims 4. But the performance and reliability, plus the improved A.I., sure is a big lure. And this sounds goofy, but the hats and boots that fit on everything is a bigger deal than it sounds! Someday Sims 4 will have seasons.

      If you play Sims 3, run NRaas ErrorTrap and Overwatch, save regularly, and back up your save folder periodically. I think that with those precautions, Sims 3 competes with the other games pretty well.

      This was’t a terribly glitchy collection of antics, really. It’s hard to call the sneaking out for school thing a glitch. That’s the way the grounding system is designed to work. It’s just stupid. I’m sure it was easier to write a system where the kid gets in trouble for EVER leaving the lot rather than check to see if they’re going to school, but it makes an otherwise fun feature impossible to use. What gets you grounded again? Failing school. Sheesh.

      The dog problem is actually caused by NRaas StoryProgression. By default, apparently it lets you adopt up to six pets. I think sims with the trait Cat Person or Dog Person are prone to hoard. While it’s funny, I’m not sure it’s a great idea to have THAT many pets running around in a single household. I set the StoryProgression setting for max pets to 3.

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